When this book was first released, it was surrounded by a lot of buzz and still is. I was curious about the life and story of Toke Makinwa so I decided to read the story. The book for the month of March 2017 is On Becoming by Toke Makinwa.
Credit to Amazon for this image
The book is a biography about Toke Makinwa’s life up to this point. She talks about her life experiences from childhood, the tragic loss of her parents and the breakdown of her very famous and public marriage. She uses her story to share key lessons on life and relationships in a candid way.
The Book’s Description
Toke never envisaged that she would be a successful media personality. She began her journey as a bubbly child but grew into a lonely teenager after the devastating loss of both her parents. For so long after, it seemed as though she would never find herself.
On Becoming is the real Toke Makinwa telling us what it is like to be one of the most talked about celebrities in Nigeria. She reveals the truth behind her 14-year relationship with the man she finally married. A marriage that ended
in an atrocious scandal that nearly brought her to her knees.
In the wake of the peaks and troughs that characterise Toke’s experiences, she now shares her struggle with blinding betrayal, finding forgiveness and drawing strength from her faith in God.
On Becoming is Toke’s journey through pain to victory.
It was interesting to get to know a bit about the person behind the name. Toke Makinwa is a private person so although she is a socialite, there isn’t that much we know about her apart from the information she has made available about herself. I found the parts she shared about her childhood and about her parent’s very open and honest.
I also appreciated her honesty in sharing the things she did about her marriage relationship because some of the things she shared are things that are very private and people would often want to remain that way.
I would have liked to know more about her career journey to success. As I touched on earlier, Toke Makinwa is someone that is private and only shares things about herself that she wishes to. I feel there would be a lot of useful knowledge to glean from her career story. Although she did touch on it very slightly when she talks about staying in London for some time, she doesn’t really explore this more.
At times, it felt it little like the story jumped from one topic to another, kind of losing us on the way there.
KEY LESSON (S)
- Do not ignore the red flags! While reading Toke’s story, it became clear there were behavioural patterns that were repeatedly displayed by Maje. It would have saved Toke a lot of heart ache had she have paid attention to the flags.
- Do unto others as you would have them do to you – from Toke’s account of her experience, it doesn’t appear as though Maje considered Toke’s feelings much. I am apprehensive to completely say that because there are always two sides to a story and we have not heard Maje’s side. It may completely flip the script.
- Love is powerful and very addictive – love clearly can make a person do things they wouldn’t have dreamt possible. Toke shares how she started using creams to lighten her skin to make her appeal more to her then spouse
- In the multitude of counsellors there is safety – Toke shares that a number of people warned her about her relationship with Maje and went as far as to say even his own sister warned her. There is definitely truth to the scripture in Proverbs 11:14.
MARKS OUT OF TEN – 6/10
Hope you enjoyed my review; do let me know if you read it yourself
Until next time
Memoirs of a Yoruba Girl
As you may or may not know, I am an avid reader though I haven’t read as much as I would have liked to over the last few months. With that being said, I’ve decided to start reading more and sharing with you what I’ve read in case in turns out you are looking for a good book too.
The book of the month for the month of January is “The Smart Money Woman: by Arese Ugwu
This was such a great book. It gives very practical financial tips in a way that is easy to relate to. It is a book I envision I will read over more than once though the first time I read it, the story was so interesting, I just wanted to find out what would happen.
It is a fictional story about a lady called Zuri who finds herself in a precarious financial position after a bit too much enjoying and not enough budgeting. We follow her story alongside a few of her friends as they learn valuable financial lessons that in turn improve their financial status.
The book’s description;
Meet Zuri. She’s living a fabulous life. Great car, gorgeous apartment, well paid job.
Meet Zuri. Broken down car, an apartment she cant afford, a job she’s about to lose.
What’s a broke girl to do?
With her best friends Tami (the flighty fashion designer), Lara (the tough oil and gas executive), Adesuwa (the conservative lawyer), and Ladun (the fabulous housewife), Zuri grows a little, learns a lot and navigates her way to making better financial decisions and building wealth.
This book tackles, debt, spending, the consumerist culture of the African middle class, the fear and misconceptions surrounding money and the lack of it, love, friendships, cultural and societal pressures and the roles they play in success. With each chapter comes a Smart Money Lesson, there to help you work your way up the financial ladder.
I liked that the author used a fictional (and quite interesting) story to help paint her picture and I also liked how the author has used the fiction to weave in key financial lessons which makes the book interesting and educational without being boring.
I think it does a great job of articulating key financial principles and is a great book for anyone who is taking an interest in financial education.
CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM / IDEAS
My only criticism is the way the story ends, which I felt was a bit sad. But given that I am a sucker for happy endings, this is probably why I think I felt this way.
I would have also liked more practical information on the investing portion, especially as a newbie investor. Some of information did seem geared to people who live and work in Nigeria which is fine, only that those of us across the pond want to invest too!
I think an accompanying workbook to go along with the story would be great.*UPDATE * An accompanying workbook is actually in the pipelines.
- Just because you have a well paid job, doesn’t mean you will automatically be wealthy. That takes some planning and money management
MARKS OUT OF TEN – 7.5/10
Until next time
Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl
I wrote this short poem for the days we travel on public transport and there is the unrelenting commuter that insists on blocking everyone’s path. If you can relate, this one is for you. (Side note: “ode” in the context of this post is “a lyric poem, typically one in the form of an address to a particular subject, written in varied or irregular metre” and NOT ode in the Yoruba language, used as an insult 😅)
We all have somewhere to be
Please tell me why you are blocking me?
I understand you don’t know your way
However understand this is neither the time nor day
Members of staff are available to help
So please be kind enough to keep to the left
All I want today is a smooth journey
So I may arrive at my destination early
When you stand in the middle of the walking path you see
You block the flow of movement for everyone (including me)
So please be considerate of what you are doing
And keep to the left so we can all keep moving
Please believe I wrote this in about 5 minutes (I’m shocked too!)
Until next time
Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl
If you’re a book reader like me, you know the feeling when you read a book that resonates with you. Every word speaks to you (literally). They literally jump off the page. You feel like you can take over the world. Then by the next day, you can hardly remember what you read 😅. This is OK if it is a fictional story you are reading but for books that you want to impact you, or books you want to learn something from, that is not so helpful.
In no particular order, these are the tips I’ve found (and am still trialing) for getting the most out of non-fictional books I read.
- Choose the book – duh! Of course choose the book but I mean choose something that interests you. If you pick a book you don’t find interesting, you may struggle to finish it. Read the description, read reviews (Amazon is awesome for this)
- Takes notes – a search on Google gave some great ideas on how you can do this. You can have subheadings that match the chapter of each book and summarise into a few sentences what you’ve learnt. So when you come back to your notes, you can get an idea of what was impactful.
- Highlight key standout phrases – we are all wired differently and what will resonate with me may do nothing for you. They will resonate for a reason so highlight it so you can revisit it again.
- Read the book more than once – this is the real struggle. It’s great to finish a book you’ve enjoyed but then it’s not so enjoyable reading it again. Consider giving it a bit of time but read the book again, you may find there are things you missed the first time you were reading
- Action! – with what you’ve learnt, what are you going to do? If you take no action, you’re better off to have not wasted your time reading the book in the first place. The action may be a new lesson learnt, knowledge gained or an action taken but you should leave with something benefical.
I hope you use these tips to change your life with some new books. Do you have any other ones? Add them below
Until next time
Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl