Category Archives: The Randomers

Enjoy Your Season

I passed my driving test in October 2014. I’ve been blessed to have been driving since then. Driving is great, really great. It allows you to leave home and your destination a bit later than if you were catching a bus/train/underground. Driving is enjoyable and gives me a lot of freedom.

HOWEVER, driving is an expensive habit. I call it an expensive luxury. I now have to think about insurance, MOT, road tax, changing my car tyres periodically, buying fuel, getting the car washed, keeping the car clean, avoiding a ticket, paying toll charges. To be honest, I am still figuring new things that I need to look after, service or pay for. The list goes on and on and on.

There was also a time I couldn’t drive. My only concern then was to buy my travel ticket or top up my oyster and plan my journey with TFL journey planner or Google Maps. I didn’t have to think about insurance or petrol or MOT. I could wile away my journey/commute lost in a book (one of my favourite things to do btw) or listening to music. I didn’t have to pay attention to the road, or the route. The driver get paid to do that. It was however more imperative that I left the house on time to avoid missing the train that came twice an hour. I was also at mercy of delays or cancellations to trains/buses.

I’ve said all that to remind you to enjoy your season. There are always positives to the current season and in the case of my driving, the season of not being able to drive is a one time season and once its gone, you can’t get it back. OF course you can still use public transport but you catch my drift.


Just some musings. Do you agree?

Comment below

Until next time

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl

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Why do Young People die?

Over the last few months, I have seen and heard of young people passing away. People younger than me, older than me, people of all ages and walks of life. It seems as though it has been happening very often of recent.

As a young person, I can find it hard to accept or imagine someone in their twenties or thirties would die. In my mind, as a young person, your whole life is ahead of you and it is a given that we will live long to see old age. In your twenties or thirties, you plan your life, your career, where you want to live, how many children to have, when to buy a house and a whole host of other things. These are all things that take time, usually several years. So maybe we take for granted that we have the time to see those plans come to fruition.

But seeing young people pass away of recent always shocks me into reality. We always pray for long life but who knows tomorrow? A lot can happen in a minute. One minute may be the difference between life and death. Life is incredibly delicate and when I think about it, life is difficult, if not impossible to hold on to. I often remember when we sleep, we are in a state of semi consciousness, almost a type of death.

I’ve said all that to say that life is incredibly precious and delicate. We cannot hold on it, however hard we try to. It ticks on and on and the surest fact of life is the fact we will all one day leave this earth. In light of that, I will do my best (and need to do so even more) to ensure I live everyday to the maximum. Ideas I have, I’ll try to not procrastinate them.

Until next time,

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl

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Father’s day Gift Ideas for the Modern African dad

I’ve consistently found my dad is the hardest person to buy any type of gift, regardless of the occasion. I guess because he is a rather simplistic guy and is satisfied by the more “serious” things in life. I imagine most other African dads (or dads in general) are similar to mine in this respect. Anyway over time, with LOTS of trial and error, we’ve been able to figure out gifts my dad will tend to like and so I’ve decided to share some of those ideas.  They may help anyone else who is also struggling to pick a gift for their African dad.

In no particular order;

  1. Sports related gifts (Mainly football)

African dads tend to be the same in their love of football so gifts related to this tend to be winners. A good gift we were able to choose was a stadium tour and this way probably the best gift we got my dad till date.  This may include a football jersey, tickets to a match, there are loads of options for sports related gifts.

  1. Personalised Gifts

Personalised gifts tend to be a winner with everyone no less African dads. I think the key is buying something that will be functional or goes alongside a hobby/interest e.g. a football jersey with his name printed, personalised stationary, a personalised number plate ( if your account can stretch that far).

  1. Clothing items 

These tend to be more practical than “fun” but you can never have enough socks, cufflinks or shirts. Obviously, ensure to choose something your dad would wear/use or you may end up buying him something that he will use to decorate his wardrobe. So if your dad is not the tie wearing type, it may be wise to avoid buying him this. He will say thank you but he will probably never use it.

  1. Sentimental gifts 

Sentimental gifts are always meaningful and are usually highly valued even if they don’t cost that much money. These may include old pictures revamped in a new frame, a painting of a picture or a photograph on a canvas or something that captures or reminds him of a special time. The options are endless and will depend on what your pops likes/needs

  1. The gift of service

It is not a must you have to buy a gift. Acts of service may be just as or even more meaningful as a gift you’ve purchased. Maybe your dad enjoys a special meal that you don’t prepare very often – make that. Maybe your dad has been mentioning he needs his phone fixed or needs some new shoes – do that. Dads are human beings too and acts of service are a thoughtful way to say you care.

  1. Destination gifts 

This is obviously if you can afford it. Dads need to relax too and the spa is a great place to relax. You can book him a spa day or a massage. Some of the stress you give him can be alleviated this way. A holiday/ weekend getaway is also great (if you can afford of course).

  1. Hobby /Personal interest related gifts. 

This will come from studying your father and knowing the things he likes and dislikes. My father is a book lover and so books are always a safe winning option. I also have been able to identify the type of genre of books he will read. This has come from simply studying him and looking at the books he tends to read. This has helped me streamline my gift buying to things I know he will definitely use and find useful.

These are some ideas I was able to come up with. Do you have some more ideas? Share them below

Until next time

Memoirs of a Yoruba Girl

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Things I Hate About Being Late 

This topic right here, it is slyly the story of my life.  I think a lot of people (especially black people) can relate to this. I have racked my brain for a starting point or a particular event that has brought about about such a lax attitude to punctuality and unfortunately I can’t think of one.

This post was inspired by this video I watched on YouTube. I’ve linked it below ⬇

So in no particular order, here are some of the things I hate about being late;

1. Having to prepare a credible argument/excuse for why you are late – this is figured out while still on the way to the destination. Excuses may range from oversleeping, to missing the bus, traffic on the way or another valid excuse.

2. Missing the beginning of the event – especially when it’s an event you have been looking forward to. For me this used to be the praise and worship part of the Sunday church service at my church at university. I LOVE praise and worship and hated missing it (obviously not enough though or I would have been earlier)

3. Sprinting/power walking to catch the train or other mode of transport to get to where you are trying to be – you give it your all to catch the said mode of transport, especially the train/bus that will help you scrap “on time”. If you miss it, there is no hope for even scraping on time.

4. Trying to cram the morning routine into 5/10 minutes – this tends to happen after oversleeping or when the alarm doesn’t go off. The morning routine which would normally take 30/45 minutes is crammed into 5/10 minutes. This is not an easy thing to do and involves aspects of the routine being omitted or being done on the way to the destination.

5. Feeling bad as you give yourself a telling off for being late AGAIN – you always scold yourself that it will not repeat itself again. Until the next time….

6. The knowing stares when you have to walk into an event late – especially when everyone else was on time. In these situations, it is advisable to perch QUIETLY at the back of the room to remain as inconspicuous as possible.

7. Having notoriety among friends for being repeatedly late 

9. Feeling a great sense of achievement when you FINALLY get to a place early or on time – it is possible. Takes a lot of planning but it is definitely possible.

Can you think of any more? Share them below

Until next time 

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl 

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Ode to the public transport “blocker”

Hi all 

I wrote this short poem for the days we travel on public transport and there is the unrelenting commuter that insists on blocking everyone’s path.  If you can relate, this one is for you. (Side note: “ode” in the context of this post is “a lyric poem, typically one in the form of an address to a particular subject, written in varied or irregular metre” and NOT ode in the Yoruba language, used as an insult 😅)

Dear passenger,

We all have somewhere to be 

Please tell me why you are blocking me?

I understand you don’t know your way

However understand this is neither the time nor day 

Members of staff are available to help 

So please be kind enough to keep to the left 

All I want today is a smooth journey 

So I may arrive at my destination early

When you stand in the middle of the walking path you see 

You block the flow of movement for everyone  (including me)

So please be considerate of what you are doing 

And keep to the left so we can all keep moving

Please believe I wrote this in about 5 minutes  (I’m shocked too!)

Until next time 

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl 

Not everyday DIY 

Happy new year 

Hope christmas and new years celebrations have been enjoyable and a fun time with family.

I am the biggest DIY advocate ever. In the era of YouTube and Google, what do you need a professional for? I have used YouTube for a number of things most especially related to hair. That includes styling, reviews, tutorials and a host of other things.

That was until I went for a professional hair consultation. I learnt so much in the few hours I was with the hair consultant I saw. Although she told me a number of things I already knew, because I saw her, she could actually look at my hair and assess it in a way I just couldn’t have done alone. 

This I guess may not be applicable to everyone as some people are more hands on than others but we can’t be experts in  everything. It’s impossible to be equally good at everything. The focus, time and practice it will take to be a pro in one particular area cannot be replicated for all other areas. It’s actually impossible 🙄. Why not then go to see someone who has the expertise in the area you are not so strong. Remember the saying “jack of all trades, master of none”. That being said I am still a DIY diehard, but I’m not afraid to ask for help.

Until next time 

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl 

Budgeting 101

This has quickly become one of my favourite topics and passtimes. 

An interesting thing about money I have found is if you don’t plan for your money, it will develop its own mind and you won’t be able to account for where it all went. Given the early wake ups and long commutes home we make to get this money, I think it makes sense to look after it. I’ve also found there are alot of things calling out for the attention of the money you have worked for e.g optional insurance after purchasing an item, the three for two offer at Tescos when you only wanted one item, the biscuits you shouldn’t even be eating.

Budgeting helps to ensure you don’t run out of money before your next paycheck and don’t have to live off your overdraft. It also means you get to stack up your savings 🙌 (another of my new favourite topics).

This is the way I have decided to tackle budgeting at the moment (I am still tweaking it).

1. I write down somewhere ALL my monthly expenses i.e what I spend my money on everyday, no matter how small. I write this on my phone and later in a book but you might do better using an excel spreadsheet. This way you can identify any bad spending habits you have and get rid of them.

2. When I get paid, I make sure I remove all my expenses first!! Doing it first helps to ensure you don’t run out of money to cover your bills and other important necessities.  If this section is taking a lot out of your expenses, consider a review of what you are spending on.

3. After I have removed the money to cover my expenses, I remove some to save – unintentionally I save roughly  a third of what I get. I think the key is to save as much as you can. A penny saved is a penny earned. This third may be further split depending on what I’m saving for so I may put some money away for my holiday and some into savings I don’t touch.

4. From the remainder, I remove money for petrol, food shoping and personal care products – I separate this from expenses because this may fluctuate, but putting money aside for it helps me keep myself in check. 

5. From the rest of the money (which by this point is not all that much) I keep some money to play with. So money for Nandos, cinema, getting a massage and other leisurely activities come from here. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and that is especially true with your money.

6. At the end of the month I sit with my receipts (which I advise you to keep) and “balance my books” 🙌 – I look at any money I have left over and save that, look at any bad/wasteful habits and where I could have saved more etc 

What are your budgeting tips to help you save that money? Share below 

Until next time 

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl 

Maiden names are underrated

We all know the story. Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love, boy proposes. Boy and girl get married. Then they live happily ever after.

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What happens to the Maiden name? It is common place that the woman will change her surname after marriage and be fully amalgamated into her husband’s family.

My question is why does the woman have to change her Maiden name.

1. What if she doesn’t like her husband’s name that much? To go from maybe a Michael to a Ogunlana or Koleosho might not be the easiest transition (no shade intended)

2. What if she prefers her original Maiden name? Nothing wrong with that right? She has only had the name since she was born

3. What if the husband likes her surname more than his? Can’t he change his name to hers, the only constant thing in life is that fact that things change, I guess your surname can follow that trend too

4. Why can’t everyone just keep their own surnames? That will prevent any confusion from either parties

5. Can we make a new surname together and roll with that

I have often wondered about this as someone who would like a hypenated surname. Technically there is no good reason why everyone could not keep their original names. I can however hear the words “culture” and “tradition” floating around.

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On the plus side, there is no complication with having to change the names on your important documents, certificates and passports. It also allow you retain a name you’ve had all of your life so far, which will be important to you and your identity.

On the other side, taking your spouse’s name would help you to maybe feel more “married”. It would make for less confusion especially when children come into the picture. And invitations and letters addressing the both of you would be easier to address.

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What do you think? Is keeping your maiden name important? Or does it not make a difference? Comment and let me know what you think

Until next time

Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl
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If you are Nigerian, you are probably going to have twins 🙋

Did you know that Nigerians are more likely than anyone else to have twins? More specifically, Yoruba women are most likely to have twins, especially if you come from a town called Igbo-Ora where “three sets of twins were born in every 19 births” giving them the highest birth rate of twins in the entire world.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/2253845.stm
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2840794/

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This high occurrence is argued to be due to the amount of yams that Yoruba people like to eat. Yams contain phytoestrogen which is supposed to encourage the release of several eggs by the woman’s ovaries at the same time.

It is such a regular occurrence in Yoruba culture, we have names, specially designated for twins. Hence why we have the beautiful names Taiwo and Kehinde. I actually love these names because they are just rich in heritage, culture and meaning. And the names are also very close to home for me (hi mum 🙋)

Taiwo or taiye wo literally means let me taste life. Kehinde or keyin de literally means came last or came afterward. In the specific context, it means coming after the first twin. These names as their meanings show are given to babies in order of when they are born. The first born of twins will bear the the name Taiwo and the second born will bear the name Kehinde. Story has it that Kehinde is the bossy of the two twins and forced the first twin, Taiwo to taste life first to decide if it was good for her to come out after. So Kehinde is actually the older as she sent her younger sibling on an errand. As Yorubas know, an unspoken right of being the older sibling is that you send your younger siblings on errands.

So if you’re Yoruba, you potentially have twins to look forward to. I love Yoruba culture, is it obvious? 😅

Until Next Time
Memoirs Of A Yoruba Girl
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